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Rebirth



And when the curtains opened, and I saw what lay behind,
I realised that, up until this point, I had been blind.
Up until this point I’d taken life on scene by scene.
And when I hadn’t liked it, I’d thrown popcorn at the screen.
 
I’d commented and pointed and, disjointed, I had watched.
I’d laughed and cried, felt dark inside, but still I’d sat and watched.
I’d breathed the breath from birth to death; I’d breathed it all and watched,
My home, the cinematic dome:  For years I had watched.
 
And now the show was over, and the curtains open wide.
My first response was outrage, for I felt the film had lied.
But in my heart I knew that it was I – I’d done the lying.
I’d watched and I’d done nothing whilst pretending I was trying.
 
And then a voice I knew so well, but had not heard for years,
Came folding in around me like a blanket for my fears.
“Do not worry.  Don’t be sad.  You stayed until the end.
“Many do not get this far.  They do not want to blend.
 
“But when you blend with what’s around you, you’re my co-director.
“The screen is not for watching.  It is there as a reflector.
“It shows us what we’re doing and it shows us what we’ve done.
“But the story’s OURS to write – and co-directing can be fun.
 
“I’m in charge of props and walk-ons, stage design and lighting.
“You’re in charge of making sure our story-line’s exciting.
“Anything you need: just ask, and I will make it so;
“People, places, artifacts – but all must be in flow.
 
“The films that I direct are for the greatest highest good.
“Call me a romantic, but it must be understood
That I will only co-direct with you if you’re on stage.
“You cannot BE the story from the confines of a cage.
 
“Now, would you like another turn to take this art in hand,
“To make our film an epic that is beautiful and grand?
“Would you like to go again, to start from the beginning,
“Knowing that the veil’s thick; that it’s not easy winning?”
I sat and pondered long and deep.  Had I enjoyed myself,
Battling my game with all my tools upon a shelf?
Did I want to go again from being newly born,
Knowing that, by two years old this knowledge might be torn?
 
By four I’d have forgotten both the cinema and voice,
And the fact that I was here not by circumstance but choice.
But all the senses, feelings, doubts, complexities and tests;
To have a human body and a mind that never rests:
 
How much fun to be in that whilst knowing all of this!
Oh! The things we could achieve together in the name of bliss.
 
“Thank you.  I would LOVE to.  I will be your co-director.”
 
“So try to be on stage, in love, not caught by the reflector.
“Only when in love are you in flow with what’s around you;
“The stage, the lights, the ground you walk – the things that I have found you.
“And when you are in flow WE are in Unified Direction.
“Let’s make a masterpiece with a beautiful reflection.”
 
And then the lights went out and the curtains closed again.
And from behind, projectors shone a golden number 10.
I counted down, ecstatic and expectant, from my seat.
The last thing I recall was being held up by my feet.

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